Two full days of fun, fun, fun

Back to my normal position today and ready to go!

What got Dan to where he needed to go after the storm? His handsome Dodge Ram Truck. High water? No problem. Tree limbs in the street? "Dodged" them. Downed power lines? Drove right on by. Big winds? Never felt them in his solid, heavy duty Ram and never heard them in the insulated cab. Space to pack up your stuff and go? The cargo box of this baby gives you length, width and depth plus the box side wells give you tons of room. Wait in line for gas? No way! Dan always felt safe in getting from point A to point B in his Ram and his truck showed it. The 2013 Ram gets 25 mpg highway.

DP in his beautiful Ram 1500

 
From Wednesday: Fritzy had his beloved Halloween sports related names. Basically, this is the same list he’s had since 2002. He always says something along the line of, "I thought we could have some fun with this" to get them on the show. These are sports names that can loosely fit into the theme of Halloween. Because this is the same ol’ same ol’ Paulie didn’t even put it on the morning run down after Fritzy’s pitch. Not satisfied with Paulie’s decision, Fritzy proceeded to send it to Dan in an email. Dan still wasn’t going to go there and Fritzy knew it, so when Dan created an accidental opening, Fritzy was right there to jump in and start rattling them off managing to give the whole list. My new favorite line from Dan: "Did I stutter? Did your ears flap?"

McLovin’s Halloween outfit worn to the studio yesterday wasn’t much different than his everyday Ellen outfit that he wears other than he substituted a vest for the V neck sweater. Worked his Ellen dances moves again. Lovin it! Now had he added a short, straight, blonde wig, now we’re talking! Looks like McLovin didn’t shower this morning – baseball cap day.

Additional Halloween tid bit: There’s a long standing rivalry between Seton and his wife at home. Seton is a Yankee apologist and his wife is a Red Sox rocker. Seton took his son trick-or-treating not understanding the costume his wife put Kieran in. Seton thought it might be from Where the Wild Things are and introduced his son as a green monster. He was close. His son was "The Green Monster" the nickname for Fenway Park’s 37’ high left field wall. Smoked!

The Green Monster leaves right handers shaking in their cleats
photo courtesy of @himynameisseton

Dan often wonders why they don’t give the SI swimsuit models suits that fit. Is there a shortage of material? Seton questioned if it was due to the economy. Sure, yep, that’s it, the economy. That morphed into how would you feel if your wife were in the SI calendar? Everyone would be thrilled and thought it would be an honor, yet Dan held back knowing how guys like them had the thoughts they do about the models. The older Dan’s daughters have become, the more we hear him say things along that line. Good dad Dan. But hold the bus, Dan loves the John Belushi peeping Tom scene from Animal House. By the way, did you know that the SI swimsuit models love McLovin? Not for his good looks or intellect. Because they think of him as one of the girls. Won’t that suck the testosterone out of your system.

Poor girls the economy has robbed them of their material

Fritzy's current obession with Hayden Panettierre is really getting creepy. Dude, drop it already Creepy with a capital C. Here’s a previous Celebrity Beach Bowl snip it: JLo was once escorted by Fritzy during the CBB but didn’t get a chance to do his awkward 3 second "Hmmm" hug because her burley body guards were surrounding him.

Fritzy just can't get enough

In the boy that was close category:
Seton and Fritzy were playing with Seton’s current favorite toy, the zippy yellow football. Seton was in the wrong area of the studio doing Hall of Fame catches and the ball got away from him knocking over Paulie’s picture of his late father on a motorcycle holding Paulie when he was little and the Father’s Day mug that Paulie got from his two girls. Fortunately there was no harm to that foul. Seton’s guilt of what could have been went with him to his the box appearance.

Little Seton isn’t so little any more - How do you gain weight while you’re in the hospital –
Paulie offers up his sister to give Dan shrinkage
No, that last part just didn’t come out right. What do all of these things have in common? New DP gear is in just in time for the holidays and it’s photo shoot day before wing sauce hits the front of their shirts. Fritzy, after being in the hospital for almost two weeks, not only had food snuck into the hospital but also felt he had to make up for lost ground once he got out. What does this mean? Another shirt size up. Latest nickname for Seton, Mr. Tubby, since he no longer can wear medium swag without it snuggly fitting over the stomach. He also struggled mightily trying to get off a smedium pull over. It was like watching Houdini escape dangling upside down out of a straight jacket. He did strike his best male model pose for us today. Work it babe! Paulie’s sister loves how Dan looks in green. The polo shirts that came in were all in XL, too large for Dan. So what did Paulie do? Offered up his sister to do some shrinkage, laundry shrinkage that is. Side note: The Passion Bucket earned another dollar today during the swag look in thanks to…….. you guessed it, McLovin. Mic not on, you loose a buck. I wonder how much he has contributed since Dan instituted the Passion Bucket program.  DP merchandise is available at: www.danpatrickgear.com  The brand, brand new stuff isn't on the website yet. 

Stay cozy and warm like Paulie with this stadium blanket
available on the website now

Did you know: Dan was featured prominantly in Brad Paisley’s video, I’m Gonna Miss Her (the fishin’ song), that won the CMA Video of the Year award.  Unfortunately, Brad didn’t prepare an acceptance speech because he didn’t think he would win and left Dan out of the laundry list of people he thanked. Side note: Brad’s wife, Kimberly Williams-Paisley is now eligible for Cougar of the Week and as Fritzy says, she’s hangin’ in there nicely.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WwRrKaq0IyY

Big meeting today at Buffalo Wild Wings after the show in preparation of the network addition of NBCSN was announced early in the show. Maybe they want to have Seton bring back his favorite lines – dude, sick dude and balls dude or Fritzy’s porno pictograph. Plenty of time for Fritzy’s neuroses to be at it’s fullest by the time they get to B-Dubs as he was talking about it already during his box appearance. Growing pains can be painful. Time to air it out and come to Jesus!

More reasons to watch:Dan got a shipment of That’s My Boy videos at the man cave for future audience give aways. How to win TBA.

A Box Score to Remember: During the Phone Booth segment Fritzy went to Fritzyland recalling a past dalliance he had. Now we know why he is so adamant about doing the Cougar of the Week segment. He was once a boy toy to his own Cougar, Simone, who it sounds like made Fritzy the sexual being he is today. Thanks a lot Simone. Paulie ran away, McLovin hid his eyes and Seton could not stop laughing as Fritzy shared his story. Keep it coming Fritzy!

Mid-reaction to Fritzy speaking of his personal cougar Simone
photo courtesy of @Kid67y

 

 

 

My favorite places for Sandy relief and support:  

 

T Shirts:

http://jettylife.com/2012/10/31/hurricane-sandy-relief-t-shirt/ … pic.twitter.com/HD75DPz4

 

Website:  http://www.redcross.org/charitable-donations

 

Text message: Text the word REDCROSS to 90999 to donate $10 to American Red Cross Disaster Relief. As in the case with other donations via mobile, the donation will show up on your wireless bill, or be deducted from your balance if you have a prepaid phone. You need to be 18 or older, or have parental permission, to donate this way. (If you change your mind, text the word STOP to 90999.)

 

Concert: NBC Universal will host a benefit for Sandy victims on Friday at 8 p.m. ET. Money collected will be donated to the American Red Cross relief efforts.

 

Continued prayers to the victims.

It's all Letterman's fault

Hey y’all – Today I was grateful for the auto reply of the show in its entirety. In the studio I realized that the two pumpkins aren’t really pumpkins, but lighted ornamentation. They had me fooled for awhile but my smart gene kicked in long enough to notice.

Dan talked a little about the arrangements he wanted with Directv before going to air on television. No make up, no stiff dress code, no stuffy still life, sitting in one place with one, maybe two camera angles. He wanted to show movement, to look in behind the scenes. Much of that is accomplished with the nine remote cameras in addition to the cameraman, plus not having red lights appear when the cameras are on. This set up puts them at ease not knowing what DTV chooses to air when. It’s said that imitation is a form of flattery, but when do the imitators stop and find their own way? You know who I’m talking to, Doug Gottlieb. So, what caught your eye or ear today?

No pants, no problem

 
From the pre-show run down: There’s two things I’ve always, and I repeat myself, always liked about McLovin. When he dresses like Ellen (Degeneres) and when he dances like her. Cracks me up every time. Whether you take it from just the outward appearance or the deeper- a man dressing and dancing like a woman who dresses like a man. It’s funny either way. Add to that Dan doing the Jay Leno high five entrance and a completely dressed, semi lap dance that McLovin gave to Paulie causing Paulie to become so uncomfortable he was taking nervous sips of water, it was killer. This had to be by far, one of the funniest pre-show run downs I can remember. I’m sure there are others, but this one has to be in the top five.

McLovin in "Ellen" mode

In the video open we explored the many facets of Dan for possibilities on Late Night with Jimmy Fallon. The montage of past Dan "looks" and descriptions – athlete, lover, fighter, coach, singer, dancer, thespian and more was so well put together. Thank you Directv/Dan Patrick production crew for such an awesome piece. My smile continued.

Oh no!  Loose ball

During the audio open we heard a montage of Dan’s wit bestowed upon the Danettes at their expense.

Dan is still concerned about his appearance tonight on Fallon. He repeated the story of Josh Charles not introducing him to Juliannne Margulies at Josh’s birthday party because Dan couldn’t say her name right. "You need to figure it out" was all Josh left Dan with for advice. Josh is truly a bad wingman. Dan isn’t concerned about doing a guest activity any longer because that is something that the A list guest do and Dan is the B list guest. At Letterman they have the A list and B list celebrities on different floors and in different green rooms. We’ll get back to where that story went from there in a minute. The segment producer that called yesterday was a big let down as Dan wanted to have a light hearted appearance on the show and not what the producer was steering towards - what’s up in the NFL, World Series and Lance Armstrong. He was really hoping not to hit heavy topics and do something other than sports.

I'm waiting for you Dan!

Sven from CA called in Mock headlines – not his best performance. Three up, three down. Maybe he should take tomorrow off and refresh over the weekend. There was a back row (Fritzy) versus front row (Paulie and Seton) mock headline show down today. At risk, having to run laps across the street if you lost. McLovin got to choose the winner and who got the jog of shame. This became a two-lap penalty for Fritzy who lost thanks to Seton’s rendition of Toto’s Rozanna, which received genuine laughs and clapping from the boss. Because Fritzy didn’t listen to Dan and continued to give bad Fallon show ideas what would normally be one lap became two. While he was jogging Fritzy kept wondering if he would get back in time before Brian Billick called in. Paulie admitted it’s not easy to run material for longer than his customary five seconds at a time. Headlines require more content and stamina. Hear that Fritzy? You have more stamina than Paulie in something. Run with it! Ahhh, make that jog with it. There was more to Fritzy doing the laps than just the competition. Today was such a mess. Keep reading.

Run Fritzy Run!

So, remember when I told you I’d get back to Letterman?
It all started out so simple as a molehill and then it quickly became a mountain. Sound familiar? What started off in the show as a "remember when" moment took over much of the look ins, the box appearances and The Box score show. There was a slightly embarrassing situation when Dan brought the gang to his last appearance on the Letterman show. After they had gotten to the studio and were in the green room Fritzy left to use the restroom at the end of the hall, next to the room where Lyle Lovett and his band were waiting to go on. Needless to say the Letterman show doesn’t put any form of air freshener in their bathrooms and Paulie took a picture of Fritzy coming out of the bathroom. The picture wasn’t bad at all. If you were not told what the picture was, you would think it was just a picture of Fritzy coming out of any room. Jokes were made regarding the band filling the hallway with the aroma of refer to rid the smell, that Lyle wasn’t Lovin’ It, Lyle Lovett’s hair being extra high that night, and so on. Seton began to loose it when Dan made the refer comment and his laughter escalated from there. Keep in mind now that Fritzy is just recently back from a second lengthy hospital stay for digestive problems. This touched a small nerve with Fritzy but he took it all in stride and carried on. I truly didn’t make a connection in the joke between the incident at Letterman and the recent hospital stay and it was evident that no one else did either while the barbs were flying. Fritzy probably did because it happened to him. Kudos to Fritzy for recognizing it was all in good fun and the value of a good bit. Fritzy’s wife, Jen, had been watching, became upset and contacted Fritzy. I felt for her and can understand her point of view. McLovin knew Jen had contacted Fritzy and while he was out doing his laps, McLovin told everyone on air what Jen had done. Oh, McLovin. He did it out of concern for his back row buddy but he should have done it during an off camera opportunity. If McLovin really wanted to look out for his back row buddy he would have chosen Fritzy as the winner because we know McLovin and Seton haven’t gotten along well in the past. Dan follows up with Fritzy when he returns asking if he’s ok and Fritzy mistakes that for how he’s feeling physically just having jogged two laps when Dan actually meant on the personal front. Seton was feeling uncomfortable and awkward and was becoming confused on what he thought was the personal line not to cross and what happened today. After all, smelly jokes have always been funny on the show and no one was trying to be mean spirited. McLovin was feeling guilty knowing that he added fuel to the fire, had admitted it, and felt it was his fault and offered to do laps or something. Dan was upset with McLovin and called him a buzz kill. McLovin’s response was to not go into the box as he was scheduled to do, so Dan made a rare box appearance instead upset with McLovin and that this was just another example of McLovin trying to insert himself into the show. Something you’ll learn is that McLovin will insult others or a situation to cover for his own insecurities, which he has freely admitted before. McLovin also insulted Fritzy during The Box Score show criticizing the Bronco’s hat Fritzy was wearing. While Dan was still in the box gathering his thoughts, McLovin decided to sit in Dan’s chair. This is something that is taboo unless you’re a guest host. McLovin’s reasoning was – well he’s in my seat, I’ll sit in his. Come on! What are we six? Then to top that he said that Dan was taking his guilt over bringing up the story about Fritzy out on him. Why didn’t McLovin take Fritzy’s laps for him if he was feeling bad? There’s an unwritten rule: You do the crime, you do the time. Fritzy was paying off the bad Fallon show ideas and the just above average mock headlines bet. Seton spoke on the day’s developments in his box appearance also. Yes, Fritzy has serious issues, they would never make fun of those or embarrass him intentionally about that, and even being the meanest Danette he wouldn’t do that. Seton then began mumbling in his own awkward shyness way with embarrassment. As you now see, this was a soap opera day, man cave style. Even now, I just shake my head.

Additional show nuggets: They need a job title for Two-a-Days for his Vista Print business cards. I should also say that Two-a-Days did a lap today as well because he thought Sven’s mock headlines were good. We were shown the picture again of the viewer that named their baby Seton and sent in a photo with the baby wearing a Dan Patrick onesie.

Dan "Two-A-Days" Overlock

 
It’s not just your regular sport show: Gossip time! Eva Longoria broke up with Mark Sanchez because he’s always in a bad mood because the Jets are always loosing. Awww Mark! Maybe Tebow should have been starting!

So, what did you learn today?