Keep Your Hands to Yourself, McTe'o ?, Can't Let Go & More

Keep Your Hands to Yourself

Big brother is watching

Just as Elway’s framed jersey has taken abuse, so has Fergie’s bust. It’s one thing to think about doing something, like Seton did, it’s another thing to do it like Fritzy and McLovin. Yes, poor Fergie’s bust has been felt up by McLovin at least once, and most likely numerous times by Fritzy. Dan says the bust is something to be viewed and admired, Fritzy feels it’s something that you should touch. Dan tried to clean off the fingerprints with the sleeve of his pull over but had to leave the fingerprints where Fergie had written her dedication for fear that he would wipe off the ink. Are all the cameras turned off after the show is done? Maybe having a motion sensor security camera or two would be a good addition to the man cave for after hours or the wee hours of the morning.

Fritzy Double Loser 

From the past crazy town days

Part One: During his call, Mark in MI, gave a Manti Te’o mock headline. Fritzy tried to top it with his own that he had prepared. Let’s say they just weren’t that good. For that, Fritzy lost the opportunity to do COTW and McLovin had to go in the box to fill in. DP is rarely likes women with short hair and this cougar did not make the exception to his rule. The cougar chosen was Anne Heche. Remember that hot mess of craziness?

Yes he wore this
Yes he said that

While in the box, McLovin revealed that he was wearing a LiveStrong t-shirt under his zippered jacket and said: "Lance is back, it’s just a matter of time." Don’t know about that. Coming out of the box, McLovin revealed the shirt to the Danettes as well. Not sure if they were sincere or not but they wondered if McLovin had been working out, told him that he looked pretty ripped in that shirt, asked if he was wearing a medium… something isn’t quite right here. Maybe a future set up?

He who enjoys & thanks himself
is a man who insults his wife

Part Two: Fans v Fritzy – It was ugly. Todd had not only his brother behind him but now his wife as well. Sexual references always work on the show and there were a few that met that mark. In Lance Armstrong fashion, Fritzy even tried to cheat, but was caught using a headline that was already done by the fans. A scoring penalty ensued but it didn’t matter. Even without the penalty, the fans had it in the bag: fans 10, Fritzy 5. Fritzy’s said his wife better have her A game on tonight as he’s going to need to be consoled. If she was listening to the show and heard the way he said that, ain’t no way. Chinese and Cinemax for Fritzy.



McTe’o ?

McLovin's Mysterious Mindy

Our own McLovin boosted his love life stats sometime during the18 – 22 years of age range with what he now claims was his own imaginary girlfriend. Name: Mindy Location: Ontario. Dan did see a picture of a woman McLovin said was Mindy from Ontario, but was she who he said she was? Supposedly she was the love of his life before his wife but she couldn’t cross the border and didn’t have a green card??? What else has McLovin told us that isn’t true? Did he go to Dartmouth? Does he know Brooklyn Decker and Andy Rodick? Does he live in a one-bedroom apartment with a wife and two daughters? Does he own hats that aren’t promotional? Just more of the McLovin mystery.








An F is an A, a D is a B

Typical Danette Report Card

Did you ever alter a grade on a report card before it made it to your parents? You’re not alone if you did. Paulie did, but got caught because a follow up report card that was sent in the mail. McLovin and DP both changed grades. Thanks to DP's older and more troublesome brothers, Mike and Bill, he didn’t get in trouble. Fritzy’s worse school sin was plagiarizing a limerick in the 4^th grade that was published in the school newsletter, which he later had to come clean. Which is worse, a grade change or a 4^th grader copying a limerick for a contest?










       

       Can’t Let Go

Could it be that Rich is
mad because Dan has
hair?

Rich Eisen is a good dad and a sensitive guy. His son, five year old Zander, came on at the end of the interview to say hi to Uncle Dan and give a shout out to his friends, Cara and Penelope. According to Rich, these are real friends, not imaginary, cat-fished friends. Rich was fine with letting go of his son so he could go to school but Rich can not let go of something that happened with the show. One day, way back in 2009, Rich was bumped from coming on the air for Dan Bickley from the Arizona Republic. Cut the cord to this event Rich, cut the cord.




Going Against His Own Grain   

Yep, that's DP's logo
on the label

When the morning started, McLovin was still standing by his picks of September 5^th: Ravens and Niners for the Super Bowl. Today during his Against the Grain segment everything changed. He’s now picking the Patriots, Seton’s favorite team, and the Falcons, or as McLovin pronounces it Valcons. He called an Audible, an Audible Ale-teration.











No Dan Alert

Yeah, he's ok to play

Dan is having surgery on his shoulder the Friday after the Super Bowl. Don’t worry though, although he will not be able to be in studio, he’s still been cleared to play for the Red Skins. 














Arcade Fire Tribute

The tribute went out to long time audience member, Tilly in Bloomington. If you follow Tilly on Twitter, @BigLiciousT you know that yesterday he lost his 7 ½ year old yellow lab, Harley, to cancer. 

Tilly's Harley

Just this side of heaven is a place called Rainbow Bridge. When an animal dies that has been especially close to someone here, that pet goes to Rainbow Bridge. There are meadows and hills for all of our special friends so they can run and play together. There is plenty of food, water and sunshine, and our friends are warm and comfortable.

All the animals who had been ill and old are restored to health and vigor. Those who were hurt or maimed are made whole and strong again, just as we remember them in our dreams of days and times gone by. The animals are happy and content, except for one small thing; they each miss someone very special to them, who had to be left behind. They all run and play together, but the day comes when one suddenly stops and looks into the distance. His bright eyes are intent. His eager body quivers. Suddenly he begins to run from the group, flying over the green grass, his legs carrying him faster and faster. You have been spotted, and when you and your special friend finally meet, you cling together in joyous reunion, never to be parted again. The happy kisses rain upon your face; your hands again caress the beloved head, and you look once more into the trusting eyes of your pet, so long gone from your life but never absent from your heart. Then you cross Rainbow Bridge together....  Author unknown...